NAS: Another Engagement?!

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Oh engagements... they are a preeeeeetty common occurrence these days.  Especially being in your late 20s... holy moly. I feel like every time I look on Facebook "so-and-so is now engaged to so-and-so," even meeting someone random and finding out they were JUST engaged or, ya know, your distant cousin twice removed has got a new man!

I mean... whoa.

While I am so happy that people are finding their person, their "one"... it stings. Oh, it does.  Because every new engagement is a (albeit veryvery small) smack in the face that reminds me that I don't have that yet! I am not there yet!  I am still alone. And still very much single.

Blah.  And who wants to be reminded of that all the time???  If you say you do... then you are cray.

Here is the thing, though, I am still at the same time, genuinely happy for these people.  I really, truly am.  It's such an exciting time!  Happiness and celebrating are a must!

I find that when I am close/really good friends with someone who gets engaged, my immediate response is pure joy.  If it's someone that I don't know very well, or an acquaintance on FB, then I'm like, "really?!?!  AGAIN?! Come ooooooon!"

So, what's the difference??  I guess it's because your closest friends' dreams and desires become your dreams and desires.  When my close friends have super exciting news, I AM SO EXCITED right along with them.... and vice versa, when they are going through something painful, I hurt, too.  That may not be for everyone, but it's very much true for me.  I'm just one of those friends that's an all-in kinda person.

Wouldn't it be prudent of me to, then, be excited in general... right from the get-go?  It's way more fun to be excited!  I don't really like being all woe-is-me-ish.  Who likes those people?!

I guess what I have tried to do is say a little prayer for the couple that have just been engaged and move on.  Ignore all the pics on FB and wandering down the path of, ohmygosh, we are the same age, what about me?!  Or, I babysat her... how is SHE engaged before ME? Ya know?!  We all do it.  It's no fun.  For anyone.

So, here is to being happy for those friends/family you know that are engaged!  Pray for them, love them.  That is what they will need (no matter how close you are to them), instead of our projected feelings of frustration, sadness and jealousy.  Be patient and trust in the Lord's timing for YOUR wonderful engagement one day.  {saying this to myself, just as much as I am to you, ladies!}

Has it been hard for you hearing about all of these engagements?!  What do you do about it?


Head on over to Morgan's and get yo' link-up on!

Next Week:
Chastity: A Choice
Living chastely (not just abstinence) is a choice. Have you ever had to defend your choice to live out chastity? If not, why do you choose chastity?

February 11
If only I knew then what I know now...
What would you tell your former self about being single if given the chance? What have you learned that you wish you could tell your younger self?

ADDED: What would you ladies think about having a Facebook page/group for the Not Alone Series??  It could be another way to get the topics out, share our posts (if we want), ask for prayers requests, and connect with people that read along, but don't blog?! Plus, it would be a great way to get info out about Savannah!  What do you think?!  Please let Morgan and I know in the comments or email us!! 

9 comments :

  1. I have the same issue! Excitement and happiness and can't wait to witness their marriage for close friends. And then "ARGH!" at the onslaught of the announcements on the Rolodex that is my Facebook. But like you said, what works is to pray for the couple and then maybe not click on a whole bunch of pictures and end up in a shame thought spiral. :)

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  2. Because every new engagement is a (albeit veryvery small) smack in the face that reminds me that I don't have that yet! - This is so me. I am excited for my friends, I so am but it is a reminder.

    To the facebook page/group YES!!!!

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  3. Awesome topic. And about the FB group - I would love that! As long as it's a closed group only we could see.

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  4. This is a great post. :) Found you over at Follow and Believe. Thanks for writing!

    Also, I think a Facebook group would be lovely!
    ~ Country Girl's Daybook, recently posted: Winter Wanderer // a Photoshoot → http://bit.ly/1mOvwcR

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  5. I LOVE this post and this prompt!! I kind of want to join in, though it feels a little hypocritical...

    I still love this series and am praying for y'all!

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    1. AMANDA! :)
      Girl, you know you can contribute WHENEVER! Please! Your viewpoint is totally valued :)

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  6. It's definitely better/easier to be excited from the get go...but, as you know, it's hard for me to not feel like I'm faking.
    I find that when it's people I'm naturally already jealous of, those people I'm more bitter towards. Like a "well, OF COURSE they're engaged! they get EVERYTHING!"

    pray pray pray :)

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  7. Jen! I loved this post SO MUCH! I felt like your thoughts were my own at some points :) I totally totally totally related you on the part about feeling PURE JOY for close friends/family. When my best friend got engaged, I cried like a baby the whole day because it was just such a beautiful engagement (scavenger hunt ending with him on bent knee in front of Jesus in a Cathedral...hello!).

    And I love the idea of a FB NAS group!! :)

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  8. LOVE the facebook group idea!!

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