We don't have to do it all.

Hello there.

Is this my blog?! It is, right?

Man... these last few weeks have pretty much been a blur. From my birthday, to crazy days at work, to a work conference in Orlando, to young adult group, to other meetings, to baby showers for friends...

to doing laundry, cleaning the house, writing thank you notes, blogging, praying, hanging out with friends...

I felt a little lost. And a whole lot of overwhelmed.

Oh, and I hadn't been to confession for 3 weeks (after going daily- who goes daily besides the Pope?!- weekly for a looooong time!).

I was feeling good!! In the past, this crazy might have made me feel bad and get down on myself. It wasn't like that this time.

It was literally: I am so busy and I don't know how to handle it.

I posted in the Not Alone Series FB group... because we have an awesome community of women... and asked for some much needed prayers. For what? I wasn't sure.

But then... peace. That's what I needed. And, by golly... you all came through! I didn't know that I needed that, but God did. And your prayers worked.

The ever wise and encouraging Cindy, of The Veil of Chastity, reminded me (us)- we don't have to do it all. Some things can wait. And it's ok.

You know that feeling when you hold your breath for a period of time and then you finally take a breath? Yea... when Cindy made that comment, I felt like I could breathe again!

Oh my gosh. She is right. I don't have to do it all. Us single ladies tend to put pressure on ourselves (probably without knowing it) to be able to do all the things. Why? Well, because we don't have a husband or kids to care for. We don't have have the family that needs us. So, why should be complain? We aren't cleaning up the kids messes or making a house a home for our husband. We don't have to keep it together for the sake of our families.

How silly it seems when written out, but how true it is for many of us. We end up having so many things on our schedules because we should have the time do to all of it. After all, we don't have kids begging for food or needed something every second. But, what is that saying about the value we put on our time? The value we put on our friends? Work? The things we love?

Single people's time is just as valuable as the wife and mom and even that Sister in her community. Our lives have value. God wants us to serve Him through everything we are doing, even though there is no husband or kids that make it obvious.

So, all you single ladies (and men!), IT'S OKAY TO NOT DO IT ALL! Breathe. You are doing the best you can. And, that's all there is to it! :)

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  1. Excellent post and reminder. I too think that I should be able to do all of these things because I'm not caring for a spouse or raising kiddos. It is nice to have a day or evening or moment to just hang out with me!

  2. A great reminder! Our time is valuable, and we need to fill it with the things God wants us to be doing now, whatever those are--and yes, I believe that includes taking care of ourselves! I have learned to be protective of my time, so don't usually find myself getting involved in too much, but the guilt of all the things I "could be doing" does weigh me down at times.

  3. Great reminder Jen! The thing I think people forget about single people is that even though we don't have kids or husbands to care for we still have a house that still gets messy even if there is only one person living in it. We still have laundry. And we need our own self-care. Especially if you are an introvert you still need time to yourself to recharge and just do nothing.

  4. Wait, you went to Confession EVERY DAY? I mean, I do an examination of conscience with Night Prayer every day, but I can't even imagine actually going through the full rite every day. Where did you even find a priest (or priests?) who would see you that often?

    On topic: I know what you mean about feeling guilty for feeling overwhelmed. Do you remember all the adults who told you, when you were in college, that you would never have more time on your hands when you did then? It was true, but did you believe them? I didn't! I think there's a similar platitude for singles. If you don't have a family to take care of (even with just one other person in it), then you must have plenty of time to do and be everything.

    Wrong. The best advice about not feeling overwhelmed came from Jen Fulwiler. She has six kids, but the advice applies to everyone (which is rare). Check it out: http://www.conversiondiary.com/2014/03/the-secret-to-not-being-overwhelmed.html


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