|Unrelated pic of a winery. :)|
I am 10 days into my new job!
I AM LOVING IT!
And. I am exhausted. 8:15? The wall. By 9? Craaaaawling into bed. If I am still up around 10? Shoot... I am probably spurting out incoherent sentences. Zombie walking.
Huh, perhaps I shouldn't even be writing this right now. It's currently 8:16. Meh... I'm a rebel. What can I say?! ;)
Starting a new job is crazy, right? LOTS OF NEW. Information overload. Trying to be friendly and get to know people. And just basically trying to figure out what h*** your job IS! I say that in the most light-hearted way, of course.
Because... it's awesome. I am just so happy to be back. Genuinely happy to be there. Right now, at this time, this is where I am supposed to be. It feels good. It feels right.
With all of that, though, I am not immune to the worry or doubts. They creep in every now and again. In ways I wasn't expecting. When I start to gloss over in yet another meeting, thoughts like, will I be good enough? Will I make my old friends/coworkers AND the new ones proud? Can I even do this?
Ya know. Those.
They are fleeting. They are moments. But they are there. I try not to dwell on them. I remind myself that I am at this job for a reason. I was hired because people believe in me. I am a good nurse. I have something to offer.
And. To be patient with myself. I have a tendency to want to do ALL THE THINGS. Get involved with that. Volunteer for that. Help with that committee. Organize the new peeps.
No. I need the foundation. I need to learn and re-learn and get the basics down (again). How will I ever be able to fully support my fellow nurses if I don't know what I'm doing? How will they trust me?
Outside of work, I find that I want to do all the things with my new parish. Go to the young adult things. Find my people.
It will come. There is no expectation for me to have a connection with people right away. Build awesome relationships right away. I can't... it just won't happen. I want that (NEED that), but I can't force it. I can't just make those connections happen.
I have to be patient.
I need to take a step back. There is no pressure to make things happen RIGHT.THIS.MINUTE. Nope. That's just silly ol' me thinking so.
Silly, Jen, ;)
Annnnnnd, this needs to end. Entering into crazy mode.
Oh! If you didn't notice... I went for it and bought a domain for the blog! I don't think anything special has to happen, but if you want to be safe and not miss any of my wonderful posts (*note sarcasm*), be sure to add this address into your reader. :)