NAS: Oh, so chivalrous!

Chivalry should not become a lost art and we, as women, ought to step up to the plate a bit more and encourage men to treat us as women, thereby respecting them as men. Do you have tips, ideas, or stories to encourage men to be... men?! Open doors for us, initiate dates, honor us as women, etc? Let's chat! (thanks, Sarah Therese!!)

Oooooook!! Here I am to write my post! I have some laundry going (preparing for #NASBoston). Let's see if I can finish it before the cycle ends! ;)

My head is kind of spinning with the direction I want to take this. There is so much that could be talked about. In our Facebook group, we had some good discussion generated from this post, and this one, which then got me thinking about all sorts of other things. The first one is from a man's perspective of the Christian dating scene, and the second is a priest's blog talking about the culture of dating today. Both were interesting, albeit frustrating and a tad sad. But! As Katie pointed out in one of the comments, it's so good that we are talking about it. It's good that men recognize dating is different, difficult and frustrating at times, and that things do need to change!

I think that's what we need to keep doing... TALK ABOUT IT. Talk about the fact that in our culture today sex and dating go hand in hand. People date for their own pleasure, looking for what they get out of it, instead of serving the other person. People don't really seem to be interested in marriage, so what's the point in being in a long term relationship? I'll just go to the next person who will continue to please me the most.

Blah. It's sad and frustrating.

But, I don't think we need to be sad for very long. Once we start talking about, we can then remind people that not everyone thinks about relationships and dating and sex and marriage in that way. There are men and women who value them and desire to seek out and encourage a life that strives to serve others instead of themselves.

So, to all the chivalrous dudes out there, listen up! There are women out there who are looking for you to be the men that God has designed you to be. 
That could be the men they date, are married to, work with, sit next to on the bus, or even their own family members.

We want you to treat us with respect and honor our dignity, just as God has designed us. We want you to hold the door for us, walk us to our car, offer us your arm, compliment us, protect us, remind us that you care.

Every man is designed to respect and honor women, just as every woman is designed to respect and honor men. Not one of those actions is meant just for a dating relationship. But for all men, in all stages of life. I encourage and challenge all of you men out there to figure out who you are and who you were meant to be, so that you can be the man God created.

And for us ladies... LET THE MEN DO IT! Let him figure out these things. Once he does, compliment him, as well. Thank him for walking you to your car. The more these actions are well received, the more they will do them. If a guy compliments you, just try to take it just like it is: a compliment. I know it's so easy to think that a guy is weird or creepy if he says something nice. Oh, I know. I tend to go down that road first.  But, I think I am going to challenge myself to take a compliment at face value and be done with it. We want men to give polite and meaningful compliments to women, so we should stop being weirded out and disgusted by them.

For more practical ideas to encourage chivalry... check out this post Morgan wrote a while ago. It's so good! :)

Well, what do you think?? This post was a bit scattered. Sometimes you just gotta do the stream of conscience posts. :)  Be sure to link up below!!

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Next Week!
Online Dating Dos & Don'ts
Not all of us have jumped into the world of online dating, but many of us have! What are those things that we should AND shouldn't do?! If someone you know is considering online dating, how would you encourage him/her? What advice do you have?

September 23
Courtship vs. Dating
It might be easy to say that the pursuit of marriage is the purpose of dating (aka courtship). But, that's not how our culture views dating. Does viewing the person you're dating as a potential spouse add unnecessary pressure on the relationship? In your opinion, is there a difference between dating and courtship? If so, what are those differences?

September 30
Our Makeup Routines
(Thanks to Bek!)
What are your thoughts on wearing make-up? Do you see a tension between a pressure from society and a God-given desire to be and make life beautiful? Is your use of makeup compatible with the idea that God sees you as naturally beautiful?

October 7
Rosary + Single Life
October is dedicated to the Holy Rosary, so we wanted to honor Mary and reflect on her help during this time of singleness. How have you called on her intercession before? What is your relationship with our Blessed Mother like? If you don't know much about Mary or the Rosary, is there something keeping you from getting to know her?

1 comment :

  1. Jen, GREAT words on chivalry! It is sad and frustrating - but again, I'm glad we're talking about it - and that's it's not just the ladies who are talking about it!


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